Why do I even try?

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If you could peek behind the curtains and see what makes this blog roll happen, what would you see? A very tired woman, trying to make a difference in the world. And what’s the point, eh? Why do I even try?

Does FemaleProfessional have a million followers, hundreds of shares on IG, and a feature article in Forbes? Heck no. Will this be the launch of a new career, will the Big Cheese take notice, or will this blog ever make any money? Don’t count on it. Oh, so do I just love pictures of myself, encroaching on the busy schedules of other women, and using my time to give free advice? Um…hello? Not in the slightest.

So…why do I even try? I recently went through an introspective exercise (which I will be sharing in a future post) and it caused me to evaluate how I measure success and how I view myself. Fascinating to really take time for that sort of self-evaluation. Truth is, it feels amazing when I get an email from a reader saying how much such-and-such post meant to them, or how it helped them with something. Amazing. And yet, there are 15 hour work days, laundry and cooking, family members who need my time, struggling friends who need to vent, and crazy stuff like my car windows getting smashed and dealing with repair shops and insurance people. (And yes, ALL of that has happened in the past month, so please forgive the gap in posting on the blog).

So…why do I even try? Compared to fashion bloggers, FemaleProfessional is a joke. Compared to Forbes and Insider, the distribution is puny. Compared to __(fill in the blank)__I’m a failure. Ah, and that’s exactly the crux of the issue. If I compare myself, my career, my personal life, my hobbies, my blogging to anything or anybody, I will always conclude that I’m a failure. Maybe you’ve felt this way, or maybe it’s just me. But, as I have taken time away from social media and really done some introspection, I have remembered what I knew when I was younger and fearless–I am unlike anybody I’ve ever met, or ever will meet. I can’t compare my life to anyone else, because I am unlike anyone else. And although my small-town mannerisms, and simple syllogisms may not disrupt markets or cause new waves of societal trends, I have within me (and you have within you!) power to make a difference. I recognize that I’m not Superwoman (much as I wish I had those abs) and most of my ambitions are just beyond reality. But for anyone else who has struggled to feel like her job, her schooling, her service projects are worthwhile, I leave you this saying which has empowered me to keep trying:

I can’t do everything all the time, but I can do something to make a difference today.

So…whatever your jam, your mo-jo, the thing that floats your boat, keep it up! Stop comparing yourself to others. Stop comparing your weaknesses to others’ strengths. Define success and happiness for yourself, and then pursue that. OK?

18 Comments

  1. Good for you; keep trying. I am no longer a young woman, but I would have appreciated a professional resource when I was getting started in the early 80s.

  2. I just realized I’m older than Richard Branson whom I always wanted to leave in my dust. Might still happen when I win the lottery. Meanwhile keep on chugging because ! for one am not ready to pull the sod over me yet.
    Home based business and office are not great for getting pats on the back or encouragement from your “co-workers” of which there are none..

  3. As the wise Amy Grant sings in one of her songs, “If it all just happened over night, you wouldn’t know how much it means. You would never learn to believe…in what you cannot see.”

  4. This so true! We have a tendency to measure ourselves to others and forgetting that we all are individuals with different talents that bring worth to all that goes on. We must appreciate who we are and what we have to offer. We do matter!

  5. Sometimes you don’t totally understand the Why. You just know you have to. Thanks for an honest perspective. Keep up the good ‘trying’ work.

  6. “Measuring our weaknesses against other’s strengths”…well said. Thank you for your insight and advice.

  7. Thanks for sharing this! I had an interview last week where I left feeling that I did horrible. I forgot so many things to mention as I was nervous. Why keep trying? This was a first for me since I usually am calm & confident at interviews. I was comparing myself mentally to a preconceived notion of what I felt they were looking for. I am not a young lady anymore, but I needed the reminder that I am still valuable and have unique abilities and talents to offer.

  8. Thank you! I feel I’m always comparing myself to others and wishing I could do more, be more. This article puts it in perspective and is so appreciated!

  9. Well, you certainly hit a chord with this gal today, a day where I was feeling particularly down and misunderstood, like nobody gets me. I think I even used the same phrase, “what’s the point” today, and then I read your post and it couldn’t be more timely are on point. Feeling like a failure must be universal at times even though some people may not admit it . Today I did actually make a difference despite my funk. I noticed you’re corporate attorney; I work for a large law firm and today I sat in on a training session for summer associates giving opening statements. This is incredibly tricky and very challenging even for seasoned trial lawyers. They were all amazing and did a terrific job. It was so energizing to be with young people and watch them be evaluated by some of the best legal minds I know, and that lifted my spirits. It was inspiring to think I made a difference because just having me there to support and coach them, I’m a marketing manager by the way, I knew had an impact on their performance.

  10. Great article! And yes, you are not alone! My guesstimate is that we all have had our episodes that are very similiar to yours. Don’t ever quit! There are many people who value your work, input and advice…and who really need it!

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